It's so good to rest in the presence of the Lord after I stubbornly fought and prayed so hard to get me out of my current situation.
Example are these 6 pieces of clothing I've just washed. Haha.. This was done for 2 days! (Walay jam!) I wanted it to be as white as snow (char.com), and so I put on more Zonrox and Surf (libre commercial) powder on them. I finally stopped when I couldn't get it done. I finally decided to put on Zonrox again, and then leave it. So I did. And ta-dah! When I took it out, it was perfectly imperfect!
It's been a year now, and I think a few months (I can't remember anymore), and I am still struggling with my finances. And I've thought of so many ways on how to get out of this hole, praying with a broken heart, and so helpless.
It's been a year now, and I think a few months (I can't remember anymore), and I am still struggling with my finances. And I've thought of so many ways on how to get out of this hole, praying with a broken heart, and so helpless.
I've made an excel sheet to list down my expenses (bills and money I owe people), tried my best to write a budget and to no avail, still end up out of the budget.
I tried to ignore it and eat, eat eat! Haha. And then I come face to face with bills I needed to pay, so I feel this little twinge of regret for squandering my money just because I wanted to eat this and that.
I borrowed money to pay another bill or money that I owe to another person (which I really hated to do, and never wanted to do, but then, I DID! OMG!). Reality bites, I still am short on money.
Finally, I came with another revelation that I don't have to fight it. I've been praying for this problem to be removed from my life, and I asked: "Why hasn't God removed it yet?"
At first, I thought it's because He wanted to punish me. Or maybe somewhere down the road, I made a mistake of giving my tithes, offerings, the portion to the Man of God, et cetera, that's why I'm suffering this. I couldn't even complete my pledge!
I soon realized that I've been praying the wrong prayer (yes, there is such a thing as wrong prayers). Why hasn't God removed this struggle in my life? Yes, He is teaching me something. I've come up with a few realizations that have broken me humbly and trusted God to do something about it. But, there's more. So today, I prayed and asked the Lord to give me strength as I go through the process. To help me get through this with His grace and love.
Now, I understand what 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NLT) says:
"Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses so that the power of Christ can work through me."
Job went through the worst ordeal of his life, but in the end, the Lord has blessed him twice as much as he had before. I have received promises from devotional, and I decided, to believe that it shall come to pass soon.
Isaiah 61:7 (NLT)
"Instead of shame and dishonor,
you will enjoy a double share of honor.
You will possess a double portion of prosperity in your land,
and everlasting joy will be yours."
So, girls and boys, go through the process if God hasn't removed that struggle in your life. Continue to pray, and believe.
"Perhaps your last place of service to the Lord seemed to be a complete failure. Yet it is possible that the Lord has simply been making you perfectly weak so that He might manifest Himself perfectly strong within you." -Ministries of Francis Frangipane
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